Showing posts with label self love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self love. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Adding One Little Thing to Your Life, Could Change it Forever!

Now I like to think that I am a healthy person.
I went vegan not long back (no don’t worry, I don’t care if you eat meat), am gluten-free, dairy-free and corn-free for health reasons and eat mostly organic fruits and vegetables. I do yoga at my lowest once a week if not every day and I meditate multiple times a day.
Yet, I still struggle with one thing. One seemly little thing....
Drinking water.
You see I have never been good about drinking water and it is not even that I have a problem with the taste.
I just do not even think to drink it most days.


I have tried everything, adding fruit, lemon juice, carrying around a big bottle, carrying around a small bottle, even writing reminders, but nothing sticks.


Now on a seemingly side note I also have asthma and GI problems, on top of other pesky issues (I'll get back to this in a moment).


You maybe wondering why is she bringing this up?
What does that really have to do with water?
Or maybe you’re saying well duh you don't drink water so of course these are problems.


But if you think about it... if you didn't feel thirsty would you be drinking water all the time?


Thirst is not actually a reliable indicator of dehydration for many people and this has been an ingrained problem for me.
I am not thirsty so I don't need to drink water....



But did you know "the Institute of Medicine determined that an adequate intake (AI) for men is roughly about 13 cups (3 liters) of total beverages a day and for women it is about 9 cups (2.2 liters) of total beverages a day." (from the Mayo Clinic)


I'm lucky if I'm consuming 2 cups a day some days...

Water is a basic building block of life right? Along with air and food, humans need this to function and even survive.  We take in this life force every moment of the day often not even stopping to think about where it came from or how important it is to our survival.


Do you know I discovered recently that dehydration directly affects histamine and mucus production? Both being connected to asthmatic systems? Hmm. So now my lack of water is connected to my breathing and allergies.
We also know that water is a main element in your body's elimination system. So a lack of water leads to the buildup of toxins and can lead to autoimmune disorders and general GI issues.


But this still didn't explain why I couldn't get myself to stick to drinking water. I knew it was good for me. I tried everything, but seemed to always self-sabotage.


What is interesting though, is as I began looking at things from a yogic stand I saw some connections I never saw before...


So lets take a look at the intake of water and such from a yogic stand.




In the east they call this life force many different names: one is prana. The classical "definition" of prana is: the energy of the universe. Yogi Bhajan once said "Praana is the most powerful and most creative thing God ever created, because out of praana came life."


Now let us take this a little further. In Kundalini Yoga, we look at the body as not just one physical body but 10 interconnected physical and energetic bodies.


You have the soul body, the negative mind, positive mind, neutral mind, physical body, arc line, auric body, pranic body, subtle body and radiant body.



The topic of the 10 Bodies can be a little hard to understand when first looking at them. I am working on a beginner course and future blog posts that will actually go through them all so don't worry and stayed tuned!


Today though I want to look just at the 8th body, the Pranic body.


This is the body that deals with your prana and is closely connected to your physic body. In eastern numerology if you are born in August on the 8th, 17th or 26th of a month you may have a weak pranic body.


I personally was born on October 8th, so this applies to me!


Two areas are closely tied to a weak pranic body: Fear and being open to illness.


If you think about this just from a personal experience stand (which I always encourage you to do) how does your breath react when you are scared?
If you are truly scared your breath goes all haywire, often times becoming rapid and shallow.
Now think about when you felt ill last. Were you taking calm, deep breaths?
Now lets put these two concepts together.


Water, food and air are all prana.


When I began my yogic practice, I did not think twice that many of the pranayam exercises were difficult for me. Aren't they for everyone?


What opened my eyes was my pranayam Module Weekend for my Teacher Training program.
Each weekend focuses on a different topic with intensive practices relating to the specific topic and with a month long practice leading up to the weekend.


For the pranayam weekend we were asked to do a combination of 30 minutes of pranayam exercises each day (not all together and many quite simple to while doing daily tasks) on top of stopping and take slow deep breaths as often as we were able.
I got through maybe a week of doing any of the practices, which is very unlike me. I tend to only miss at the most a few days of our daily practice, if any at all. This month I almost didn't even do the practice. And to top it off I started experiencing physical asthmatic discomfort as I worked to bring prana into my body.
I even could not, emotionally, get through more than one minute of our one minute breath practice without sobbing...


I was so relieved to just make it through the weekend, that I pushed aside any thought of pranic work and went on to the next month. Fast forward to a month or two later as I felt safe enough to begin looking into my experiences from that weekend.


I know I am a giver.
I feel fulfilled when I serve others and give of myself (often without thinking of my own energy limits). But when it comes to receiving I become uncomfortable. I assure people I am fine on my own, that they do not need to trouble themselves. I will make full healthy lunches for others while I personally skip meals, or just grab a shake.
I have also been controlled by fear of my own potential for most of my life. Falling into a more supportive role for everyone around me.


When I stopped and thought about it, I realized I struggle accepting prana in any form into my life.


Let us say that again.



I struggle accepting life force, for my own well-being, into my life.


WOW.
That is pretty intense.


But knowing the root concern allows us to fix the issue not the symptoms. It is not that I don't like to drink water, I personally struggle to allow any prana into my body that is not vitally necessary.


So what do I do now, you ask? What do you do now, if you are in the same place as me?


It is a big thing to handle partially because a lack of prana leads to physical and emotional imbalances. Including a strong feeling of fear when dealing with life...


Well my friend, now we work to heal ourselves.


We work to allow bits of prana into our life every day. It may start as a trickle, but as we work to unblock the faucet, the flow of prana will grows to a strong stream.


I spoke about your breath and gave a few simple pranayam here to get you started that can help.


Also try the Ra Ma Da Sa meditation for 11-31 minutes a day:


Here is just a simple track I recorded of the Ra Ma Da Sa meditation mantra. There is just around a minute of the melody vocals to get you started and then up to 31 min of just a simple relaxing backing track to chant with. So you can listen to your own voice while chanting.






Posture: Sit in Easy Pose (sitting on the floor, with legs crossed) or in a chair with feet planted firmly on the ground, with the spine straight, and a light Neck Lock applied (chin pulled back slightly).

Mudra: The mudra (hand position) is most important. The elbows are bent down by the sides, and are tucked comfortably but firmly against the ribs. The forearms are almost perpendicular to the floor, with the hands extended out at a 45 degree angle from the center of the body. Most importantly, the palms are perfectly flat, facing up, hands bent back at the wrists. You should feel a pull in the lowest part of your forearm as you almost hyper-extend your wrist to make the palms flat. (This tends to be the most challenging part of the meditation so it is important not to let the hands relax out of the position.) The fingers are kept side by side, except that the thumb is spread from the other four fingers.


Eyes: Eyes are closed.


Mantra: This mantra consists of 8 basic sounds:
Ra Ma Da Sa, Sa Say So Hung
Translation:
Ra - Sun
Ma - Moon
Daa - Earth
Saa - Impersonal Infinity
Saa Say - Totality of Infinity
So - Personal sense of merger and identity
Hung - The infinite, vibrating and real.
This mantra taps into the energies of the sun, moon, earth, and the Infinite Spirit to bring deep healing. It is important to pull the navel point powerfully on the words So and Hung. Note that the word Hung is not long and drawn out. Rather, it is clipped off forcefully as you pull in the navel. Chant one complete cycle of the entire mantra with each breath. Then deeply inhale and repeat. Remember to move the mouth precisely with each sound. Try to feel the resonance in the mouth and in the sinus area.


Mental Focus: You can choose to mentally visualize the person or persons that you are wanting to heal, as you send this energy to them for their well­-being.


Time: Continue chanting for 11 to 31 minutes.


To End: To end the meditation, inhale deeply and hold the breath, as you offer a healing prayer. Visualize the person you wish to heal as being totally healthy, radiant, and strong. See the person completely engulfed in a healing white light and completely healed. Then exhale and inhale deeply again, hold the breath, and offer the same prayer again. Exhale, inhale, and hold, repeat the prayer, and exhale.
To complete, inhale deeply, stretch your arms up high, and vigorously shake out your hands and fingers for several seconds. Keep the arms up and hands shaking as you exhale. Repeat two more times and relax.


If you are a visual person here is a video explaining the meditation:


Most importantly with any healing process:
Don't judge yourself if you "fall off" or don't do as well as you hoped one day. It happens, life happens.
Just take a deep breath and pick up where you left off.
I also find that a support system of any kind can be a great help as well.


So let us start TODAY! I know I am recommitting with all of you today. Right here right now to let the Life force of the universe nourish my body.


So let’s see if we can add at least one extra deep breath, a moment of letting someone help us and yes, an extra glass/ bottle of water a day.


We can do this! We will open ourselves to the prana of the universe and maybe even start drinking those glasses of water ;)


Bright Blessings,
Param Sevak Kaur


*Please share your thoughts and progress in the comments. I'd love to hear about your journey!





Thursday, January 22, 2015

Some times I'm scared of myself

So I'll be frank with you all.
Some times I am absolutely terrified of myself, of taking a look inside of myself.

Why you ask?

You know I don't even really know the answer. Some people say it is because we are scared of our own greatness. Others say it is because we are scared of our own darkness. All I truly know is that when I am true, real and honest with myself, and try to take a look in there are times when I feel such a vastness inside that it scares me.


Now really it is not a "bad" vastness no, it is just simply vast. Full of all the darkest of nights and brightest of days. Full of endless gorgeous possibilities and a wasteland of despairs.



And that vastness, as large as this entire universe, completely and utterly terrifies me. Some days when the band aid of "my reality" is ripped off (the world I have create in my mind that is contained and "simple") and I am asked to embrace the infinite potential and totality of myself, I just want to curl in a tiny ball and cry.

Seeing that vast void within is like watching at a star 'explode'. 
It is truly terrifying and yet at the same immensely beautiful.


Maybe it is because I have created this concept of what it is to be a light being and that there is no place for the darkness that I hold inside of me. Maybe I have been told, and lead to believe, by myself and others that you can not have darkness with light?

But I know some where deep inside of me this is false. There is not light with out darkness and vice versus. So how the hell does a "holy" light being experience the dark within with out judgement or restriction?

Many different belief cultures have darkness balanced with the light. (I am just pointing out some of the feminine archetypes I have personally been drawn to there are many more)


Some in the judeo/ christian faith, look to the Black Madonna as well as her pure virgin counter point. Also, some see Eve and Lilith as a balanced aspect. There is also Persephone and Mother Kali just to name a few other.

So why is it that we as humans feel we must be one way or the other. That this great vastness must be placed into our little box so we can 'understand' how we relate to it?


Maybe this is the biggest question for ourselves? What happens when we stop trying to BE something? The sun does not decide to shine each day, the tree does not decide to lose it's leaves in the fall. They just ARE. 

But do we even know what and who we are... 


We become so wrapped up in what we should be that we forget who we already are.  And I guess that really is what comes to scare us. We are not afraid of our greatness or of our darkness, but the fact that we are it all and we do not know how to deal with that. 

All Light is not good and all Darkness is not bad and that makes the world and ourselves more complicated to deal with. 

It means we see ourselves in everything, because we are everything and that is HUGE!!! So maybe that is why I am scared to look at myself. I am scared that I am a big infinite ball of Gray. A creator and destroyer. That I am more amazing and more terrible that I could ever imagine. And that that is exactly as I was made and therefore I have an immense responsibility in this world to honor and acknowledge EVERYTHING. Because, if this vast darkness and light are inside me, and I was made this way, then that amazing beauty and horrible destruction all has a purpose and we are all part of it. 


So maybe when I go to take a look inside, I will look from a place of wonder instead of a place of judgement. And then when I look into the sparkling terrifying vastness inside myself I will no longer be scared, but amazing and grateful.

*Added meditation

In response to everything I thought about, wrote about, and posted yesterday, it seems the universe decided to give me a helping hand. Here is a Meditation that deal exactly with what I posted about :)


To make peace with the shadow try reciting the 18th Pauri of Japji Sahib 11 times a day. 
At 40 or more days you "clear yourself of attachment to good or bad, to overcome deep feelings of inferiority, to break self-destructive behavior patterns, and to surrender in complete acceptance of what is-both in yourself and in others".
From I am a woman p 83

18th Pauri of Japji
Asankh murakh andh ghor.  Asankh chor haraam-khor. 
Countless fools, blinded by ignorance. Countless thieves and cheaters. 
Asankh amar kar jaahe jor. Asankh gal vadh hatiaa kamaahe.
 Countless impose their will by force. Countless cut-throats and gather sins.
Asank paapi paa kar jaah. Asankh kuriar kure phiraah.
 Countless sinners who keep on sinning. Countless liars, wander lost in their lies
Asankh malechh mal bhakhi khaah. Asankh nindak sir karah bhaar.
Countless wretches, eat filth for food. Countless slanders, make their heads heavy 
Naanak nich kahai vichaar. Vaariaa na jaavaa ek vaar.
Lowly Nanak, gives this explanation. I cannot even begin to describe You. 
Jo tudh bhaavai saai bhali kaar. Tu sadaa salaamat Nirankar.

Whatever pleases You, All will be blessed, You always protect us, Formless One!



To help me keep track of my 40 days. I color in a petal each day I mediate, so when I finish I have a beautiful lotus to remember my journey:



Love to all
PSK











Monday, January 19, 2015

Finding the healthy path with unhealthy relationships

So there have been a few things floating about in my head over the last few weeks and I wasn't sure which one was going to win out for me to write about.  But what has been on my mind the most it seems lately is what does one do about relationships with others that are unhealthy.

So I've talked loads about coming to peace with yourself and I will most likely continue to talk about that. But, the question comes up:

"What do you do when the relationship with someone else in your life is unhealthy?"



Hmmm that is a tough one. Right? Especially since often we care about the person, that is why they are in our lives. 
Where is the line between helping and loving others and helping and loving yourself drawn. 
I know I have always personally struggled with this. If I love the person I should support them, stay by there side and help them right? That is what you do for a person you love. But when do you draw the line? When do you say, "this is not healthy for me". 
This is not always easy. 
Many times we stay in toxic relationships, be they romantic or just platonic, because we feel it is "the right thing to do". I know! I'm the queen of this mentality. I often put others needs above myself in attempts to care for them and love them. But love without guidance can hurt sometimes more then it can help. What you say? How does that work?

Simple.

Sometimes at a certain point by trying to "help" a person you are actually not helping but sheltering and not letting them walk their own journey.

Now I'm not saying don't help people. Not at all. I'm saying you have know when it is time to let the person walk by themselves. You can be there on the side lines if they fall walking in the right direction, but you can't hold some one's hand forever while they run around where ever they wish.

So, how do we know? How do we figure out when it is time to stand aside and say, "No you have to walk on your own now. I am not going to hold your hands this time?" 

I have found that when you really care about someone you give your love and energy to the relationship. Therefore when things start to go south, or it becomes obvious things are not healthy or supporting you, it is time to have a serious talk with yourself. 

Ask yourself two questions:

1) Am I Happy?

This is a big one. Be honest and real with yourself. Are you actually happy cut and dry simple. No.. well sometimes on a Thursday when the sky has four clouds and I'm wearing my pink shirt answer. Just cut and dry at this moment when you look at the relationship are you Happy?

If you answer isn't a resounding YES! Then it is time to look at why. This process is not always pretty, but it is necessary. 

2) Does the person support my growth as a human being?

If you don't feel inspired, supported or uplifted when you are around the person maybe it is time to look at the role they play in your life. The energy you surround yourself filters into your being and can shape the path you walk in this life. Hell if I have to choose to be surrounded by positive, loving people or negative hateful people I sure as heck am going to choose the people who are positive. Have you ever been in a great mood and then someone at the office was just so negative and it felt like it just sapped out all the joy in your day? Why would you want to surround yourself with that all the time? Of course you can't always help who you are surrounded with, but if you can choose and if they are someone you care very deeply about, wouldn't you want to have them bring you up not down?

So now if you were honest with yourself, you know if this person belongs in your inner circle. If you listen to your inner self it will never steer you wrong.

Try this Kriya if you really are unsure which way to go. It can help you tune into your intuition:
*note make sure to tune into your higher self with the Adi Mantra  before you start your practice (a video is coming soon for you all :) )

Kriya to Know Through Intuition


This kriya develops your ability to open to the Unknown through intuition and sensitivity. The first exercise done with the One Minute Breath links the Heart Center, the Arcline and your projection. Feel your magnetic field and Aura as you meditate. Establish an open, sensitive and unlimited field.
In exercise 2 the Sixth Chakra is stimulated into action with the sound of the high pitched whistle. The sound relaxes and opens. The hand lock enhances neutrality. The third exercise is the fulcrum. You create a polarity between the fixed hand position, like antennae, and the relaxed cells of the rest of the body. You welcome and receive the information and intuition from the known and Unknown. It is an excellent kriya to prepare for powerful prayer and to develop intuition.
1. Sit in Easy Pose with the spine straight. The left elbow is bent, palm flat facing the floor, in front of the Heart Center. The right arm is extended out to the front at a 60 degree angle. Close the eyes and breathe slowly and honestly. (Work up to breathing only one breath per minute.) Feel the Divine Presence around you. 11 minutes.
To end, stay in the position, inhale deep, hold the breath 10 seconds as you tighten all the muscles of the body. Exhale. Repeat 2 more times. Relax, roll your shoulders, stretch your arms and rib cage.
2. Extend the arms straight out in front of the chest with the palms touching and the thumbs locked over each other. Close the eyes and whistle a song of your choice. 7 minutes.
This posture affects the parathyroid and you may feel a pressure in your neck.
3. Put the hands in Lotus Mudra at eye level. Relax the entire body but hold the hand position firmly. Close the eyes for 3 minutes.
This is an intertwined action when one part of the body in a confined posture becomes the antenna and the rest of the body is relaxed to receive.
To end, inhale and clasp the hands in front of the Heart Center and press as hard as you can. Exhale and repeat 2 more times. Then relax, talk, and ground yourself for a few moments.
© The Teachings of Yogi Bhajan

[This kriya can be found in Transformation, vol. 2]





So now that you know if this person is someone who honestly supports your life and growth, as a person, it is time to apply this knowledge to your life.
If this relationship is not healthy then it maybe time to move away from this person and allow new people into your life. *Note: If you are in an abusive relationship and fear for your safety or the safety of others please seek professional help. If is okay to ask for help!! You deserve a life full of love and light, from yourself and others. 

This can sometimes be painful for all parties involved depending on the amount of energy you have invested into the relationship.

But breath, life is full of change and motion and this is just another change in your amazing beautiful life!!!


If you feel stressed about the situation you are in you can try this simple meditation as well:

Meditation for the Calm Heart  
1. Sit in easy pose with a straight spine, close the eyes or look straight ahead and leave the eyes 1/10th open.
2. Place the left hand palm down on your heart center. Bend the right arm resting the elbow against the side of the body, and hold the right hand in gyan mudra (thumb and pointer finger meeting with the other fingers extended) at the level of the shoulder.
3. Inhale deeply and retain the breath as long as you comfortably can.
4. Then, exhale slowly and hold the breath out as long as you comfortably can.
5. Continue for 3-5 minutes.
Note: Do not hold the breath in or out so long that you’re gasping or in distress. You may need to experiment a bit. Holding the breath out can be more difficult than holding the breath in because you are confronting a fear of death, but just relax and take it slowly. Soon you will be able to move past that fear and grow in your strength. 
 The Meditation for a Calm Heart can be found in Meditation as Medicine byDharma Singh Khalsa, MD. 

 Much Love and Light to you all! I hope you continue to walk forward strong and tall! Bringing the light and love you all deserve into each and every relationship.
P.S.K







Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Listen to Your Soul and Move Forward with Your Life


I know I am a bit behind with this post, but there is still some full moon energy that hangs around after the actual full moon. So, HA!

This past New Years, I talked about allowing yourself to mourn the past so that you can let it go with grace. With the Wolf Moon that just occurred (the First Full Moon of January) we have that chance to continue this work and release, cleanse and move forward from things that no longer serve us with a clear intuition and focus.

Every full moon has it's own energy that it gives off that then is layered upon by it's current astrological positions and events. I am just going to look at the base energy here but take a look at what astrologically is happening for a deeper understanding of what is going on around you.






So.... The Wolf Moon ...

I don't know about ya'll but it seems to me lately like everyone has been dealing with some pesky issue of their past lately. It could be an actual event or just a mental/emotional pattern that they are now looking at and asking "Do you serve me any longer?"

In my previous post I dealt with the first step of really letting go and that is honoring what is no longer serving you. Now we are ready to get down and dirty for the work ahead. The Wolf moon comes in one of the coldest and hardest times of the year in the northern hemisphere. This is the time when food is scarce and life can seem some what bleak in the wilderness but this is also the time when the Wolf is heard howling as a beacon in the night. 

She says now is not the time to meander around, picking and choosing what you think you need.  That luxury is reserved for warmed times, when the food is plentiful and the earth is awake. No! It is the heart of winter. Now is the time to cast aside all that is not serving you. Now is the time listen to your instinct. Now is the time to ACT so you may survive and thrive!

So sit down and think. Have I actually let go of what no longer serves me? It is all well and good to give honor and mourn parts of yourself, but it does you no good if you continue to cling to something you no longer need. 
If you are still clinging. 

LET IT GO!!!!


There are all kinds of ways to help yourself release things:

  • One of my favorite ways to release  is to write down a word or phrase that represents some thing you wish to let go and then bury it or, if you wish, burn it! It can be very cathartic to physically "give up" that representation of what you want to let go.

  • You can cup your hands together and image blowing out, into your hands for a few minutes, the idea or feeling you want to release. 

There are just a few ideas to get you started. 

After you let go of the past, it is time to begin focusing forward onto the future. 



Remember it is the time of the Wolf Moon so as you move forward trust your deep intuition. Deep down in your soul you always know what is the right path for you. So if you are unsure where you should focus you new Wolf energy, try these two exercises:

Sit down with a large selections of magazine with all sorts of images and articles, a pair of scissors, some glue and a piece of card stalk. 
Now flip through the magazines and see what images and words stand out at you. DO NOT try to second guess or make the images fit what you think they should be. Just pick images and words that appeal to you. It can be you liked the color or the sentiment of the image or the word/ words just jumped out at you. When you have gathered a small collection take a moment and see what you have and play with arrange it (with out glue) on your paper. You probably notice a theme starts to form. When I did my collage I found that most of my images where of nature and my words happen to all be about shining on your new path/ journey. For me, this collage is reminder of my desire to reconnect with myself and the beauty all around me. What does yours say to you?



Writing Exercises
Sit down with a piece of paper, a pen or pencil and a timer. Now write out 1 month, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months and 1 year and place only three lines under each heading. Like so:
1 month
1._____________
2._____________
3._____________
3 months
1._____________
2._____________
3._____________
ect. 

Take your timer and set it for 45 minutes and begin to write out your goals for the next year. Remember you can only put three goals under each heading so really think about what you want to put on this sheet. I know when I began my goal sheet last year, there was a project I felt 'I had to be a part of' yet, when I sat to write down my goals for the year that project didn't make the cut. I ended up realizing that I didn't actually want to be a part of the project and had stayed as long as I did only out of a sense of misplaced responsibility. 
As you write your goals, word them positively and with a sense of affirmation. Here are some examples:

I will love myself more when I look into the mirror.
I will be working as a contributing writer for Mantra + Yoga.
I will be working on my art more than I ever have and it will fill me with a sense of joy. 
When the time goes off put your pencil down. Your list is done! Take a look at where YOU want to head in the coming year and now make it happen. Believe in what you have written! 


This is your time to listen to yourself, focus and thrive. Hear the wolf's call and Live your Life. 



May the knowledge in your heart guide you to survive and thrive even in the harshest conditions!
Bright Blessings
<3 PSK